October!

It has been few weeks I didn't blog

I guess everyone is so busy until no one notice I have ditched my bloggie for so long

It seems that October is a busy month for everyone

Those who are having study break, especially Lichin

All the best in your EOS examinations

Study hard and take care!
First and foremost, I would like to thank those who planned so hard to give me a birthday surprise!
It was an advanced birthday celebration on 221012

I'm dumb as usual

Actually I guess sth is going on but I didn't know it was on yesterday 

I'm happy and surprised by those awesome friends

This surprise was very special because there are my high school friend, pre-U friends and uni friends

Now I would like to thank them one by one

Thank you, Karen. My only Punjab friend!
Thanks for putting so much effort in making the gift and I knew you started planning it one month ago

I really appreciate that 

Thank you for bringing those pizzas and flying from Bangsar to Bukit Jalil just to give me a surprise

Thanks for running here and there to get some "things" done 

Seriously,I really APPRECIATE!

Thank you, Jenn. One of my awesome and super caring friends!

Thanks for wasting your money to invite friends to join this "surprise giving event"

I know you get stressed up because you couldn't have enough time to get your tasks done

I really hope you can cure your insomnia 

Thanks for everything

Thank you, Lichin. My 7 years friend!
Never know you come here was part of the plan

Thought you really miss me and want to meet me up :p

Your "study plan" in IMU sounds real and convincing

Never expect you to come here and give me surprise too! 

And stay overnight!!!

I feel so close and warm! Sincerely...

I really hope you enjoyed too

Thank you,sweetheart!

Thank you Khai for flying from Taylor to Titiwangsa LRT Station

From Titiwangsa to Sri Petaling

It made me feel so touched and I was so shocked to see you

Thank you for sparing your time to come here

I'm glad to meet you up and know you're doing well

Thank you Zac and Teck Kok. My uni brothers!

I know it is quite awkward for you guys to join my pre-U friends and high school friend to give me surprise

I'm touched because you guys made it for me 

It is my pleasure to meet you guys even though we like to tease each other

But seriously, I appreciate you guys! 

You guys did help me quite a lot

Thanks a lot!

I would like to thank my housemate as well because he needs to bear with our noisiness 

Thank you Chia Ren

Last but not least,

I want to thank the most special friend, my only one who is far far away!

I don't know what you did behind me to arrange or plan all this

I heard from someone that you put in effort to give idea 

You are the one who know me the most 

You know what I like and you're trying so hard to give me what I like

I'm touched! Besides touching, I don't know what word I should use to express

I know something is flying to me and you are the sender

Thank you in advanced for that 

I appreciate you...really...

In a nutshell, I would like to bow 90 degree to thank all of you

To show my appreciation, I will love you guys more 

And treasure you as my super awesome friends! 

Muacxxxxxzzzzz...
The photos will be uploaded soon!

Enjoy the cam-whore session with Jenn and Lichin!
<3

*A random message to Zichina Cheah
May God help you to make you stronger 

May God help you to solve your problems 

*A random message to Puishan Tan

I hope you have a happy starting in HELP

All the best in your degree life!
<3

眼泪

时间越久，我以为我越能放得下

其实我越不能放下

走到哪里，我都仿佛能感觉你

看到你的影子

从来没有试过这一种感觉，这一种痛

躺着躺着，眼泪不知觉地流下来，弄湿了枕头

脑海里不断浮现同一个影子

其实现实一直不断在告诉我，是时候放手

没有了爱做基础，那什么都不是

既然对方那么努力地隐藏及说服自己放手

那我又何必紧捉着不放呢

因为我爱，我在乎，我不希望这样子结束

我一直不断地说服自己，做回朋友

可是还有爱，我就会期待，我真的希望会有转机

一向认为只要曾经努力去争取过

就算没有成功也没关系

至少对得起自己的心，至少努力过

这一回，我想努力的机会被剥夺了

我真的是彻底的失败了

难道是我太天真？

我的情绪很低落，因为我们再也不是我们了

一切有意义的，如今都变得没有意义了

嘴里的面条，掺杂着泪水的咸与苦

此刻的我只想找一个可靠的肩膀或者是一双耳朵

让我发泄，让我诉苦

不断的抽泣与哽咽，让我没有办法好好的进食

现在的我只能告诉自己，I'm on my own..

有很多想要跟他分享的东西，我都得往肚里吞

Let those unsaid words remain unsaid

我告诉我自己，我要自私一点，绝一点

到底要怎样我才做得到？

因为还有爱，我心软，我做不到

王俐璇，振作一点，你可以的！

First Day of Oct- Monday Blue

I woke up quite early this morning to get my PTPTN documents done

I went to have breakfast with my dad

When I was eating halfway, I recalled our fond memories

I recalled a scene where you and I were sitting in the bus 

I recalled a scene where both of us were studying in DSA room

I recalled our Tioman trip

I recalled our Singapore fried meehoon 

Then the first thought which came across my mind is

I want to tell you how much I miss you

"Bee,I miss you so badly.."

I did say it in another way

End up with a reply of "haha"

So many things have changed which I don't really wish to

I thought I have accepted the truth

However, when come to certain point, I just can't 

How much I miss you..all my thoughts..

I dare not to share and I think I'm not supposed to share

I have no one to share about all this

It is so suffering because I have to keep all to myself

Type halfway now and my vision is getting blurrer 

Heartbroken..heartache..

I'm no longer important to you

No longer..

I feel so sad when I think about this 

My time was occupied with quite a lot of stuff 

But I just can't help it when those things keep popping out

And you keep running in my mind

Nowadays, I think you can hardly spare time for me

You sounds normal but I keep feeling one kind

I don't know this is because I'm too sensitive or what

It seems that I varnish in your life

No longer care no longer important no longer love

I don't know what you feel actually

I don't know...

It seems that you won't feel lonely or empty without me

You are still okay even without me

My existence doesn't give any impact to your life anymore

I know I'm negative now 

I may regret with what I typed here in the next min

I hate the feeling of insecure 

I'm on my own..

To do everything..

I'm tired

By the way, I know some of you are very caring 

I feel it! Seriously..

I keep it in my heart

I really appreciate

To noname

Remember what I told you in the evening

Don't think so much..